Jarvis Cocker singing I Wanna Be Like You from The Jungle Book. Pete Doherty singing a Mary Poppins’ song.

No the world has not gone mad. Disney has just been given a rock n roll makeover.

The Forest of No Return was a special gig (part of the Meltdown Festival) at the Royal Festival Hall London yesterday (Sunday 17 June) where star rockers reworked classic Disney tracks.

Kate Moss was on hand to fetch and humph boyfriend Pete’s guitar. The Ronald wants to point out Moss is wearing Louboutin heels not unlike the ones he mentioned at Fashion At 4pm yesterday.

Back to the music. Pete Doherty is rumoured to be reuniting with Libertines bandmate Carl Barat for a performance at this year’s Glastonbury Festival. Stevo

Check out the shoes

David Beckham is perfect for Hollywood. He has just delivered an emotional last-scene in Madrid.

The star footballer bowed out in his last, best performance with a 3-1 win over Mallorca. It is his club’s first La Liga title in four years.

‘I couldn’t have dreamt it any better,’ said Beckham.

‘It’s been about winning the title for the last six months – and we’ve deserved it tonight.’

Beckham is now heading in the right direction of Hollywood and will join the LA Galaxy next month. Stevo

LA dreams are made of this

Now we never thought racing cars would make it onto our wish list. Then came along Lewis Hamilton.

The Formula 1 racer is on top of the world after winning the USA Grand Prix.

The Brit-born 22-year-old is having the time of this life and got to fizz up the champagne after vrooming over the finishing line first.

Not only is he the fastest thing on four wheels, he is also rich, good-looking and unmarried.

We hear even Hollywood has been overcome by Hamilton’s exhaust fumes.

The starlet singletons are fighting over who gets to share the spotlight with him. Just wait until Lindsay Lohan gets out of rehab and Paris Hilton is freed from jail. You can drive fast, Hamilton, but you can’t hide. Julia

Faster than the speed of light (almost)

It was something we thought would never happen – being blinded by the dazzle from Simon Cowell’s teeth (he’s gone all Hollywood and had them whitened, darling).

The music-mogul-talent-scout is happier with a scowl on his face. And then came along Britain’s Got Talent.

Last night Mr Frown was struggling to find some nastiness to throw at the acts. Fingers twitching on the buzzer, he was thwarted time after time. Instead, he had to smile and admit even he was entertained.

The talent show has forced him to splutter on one occasion, ‘I didn’t like it, I loved it.’

He even praised winner Paul Potts and said the singer would be in a recording studio next week recording his first album. Potts, the confidence-challenged worker from Carphone Warehouse shuffled out into the limelight and stole the show with his astounding operatic voice. Claudette

One loves Potts

Girls Aloud singer Nadine Coyle has the best legs of 2007, according to the latest Smash Hits music TV poll.

She had tough competition from the likes of Kylie and Jamelia but strutted into first place in the end. The 20 best legs (or should that be 40 legs or 20 pair… confused?!) in the business are:

1 Nadine Coyle
2. Kylie Minogue
3. Jamelia
4. Gwen Stefani
5. Christina Aguilera
6. Cheryl Tweedy
7. Beyonce
8. Britney Spears
9. Tina Turner
10. Danni Minogue
11. Madonna
12. Mariah Carey
13. Kimberley Walsh
14. Cyndi Lauper
15. Amerie
16. Mutya Buena
17. Leona Lewis
18. Heidi Range (Sugababe)
19. Jessica Simpson
20. Rihanna

She’s got (top-vote) legs

The time of day when we need a wardrobe pick-me-up.

Girlfriend, get your shine on because patent shoes are the summer must-have. Step outside in polished feet and you can forget the rest. Wait a minute, underwear is a must (reflection, reflection, reflection).

Christian Louboutin decollete patent leather pump with a 120mm stack heel, £395. Drool…

Next peeptoe slingback wedges, £25.

Candy who? She’s the opinionated mum of Tori Spelling who can’t help but comment on fallen stars who have lost their shine. Britney Spears is the latest in the Candy-firing line in a open letter published hours again.

Dear Britney

You made me do it… You’ve driven me back to my laptop to ask why, if you have to slither in and out of cars, do clumsy imitations of gymnasts and wear clothes that are just too tight, trashy or skimpy, do you have to pose in front of photographers all the time?

‘We’ve seen the body parts, poses and clumsy attention-seeking tricks before. You’re wearing out your welcome. Some people never can turn away from a train wreck, so who can blame the photographers for waiting for your next one? Do you really want captions such as TMZ’s own “Victim of Pap Smear” and “Does Britney Change Clothes for Cash” to be your legacy? You can do much better…’

It goes on and on but it will put you off your Sunday breakfast. Julia

I’ll put a Spelling on you!

Britain’s Got Talent was all stars and cheers last night when two more super-stars-to-be made it into the final round.

Connie Talbot and the Bar Wizards got the thumbs up from the voters and the judges.

Simon is still smitten by the talents of six-year-old Connie, who still wowed despite a poor song choice with the complicated-music-composed-song Ben.

Singer Tony Laf and Michael-Jackson-lookalike (early days) dancer Scott Holtom were shown the door. Shame but that’s showbusiness. Tune in tonight. Claudette

The time of day when we need a wardrobe pick-me-up.

We saw Victoria Beckham breeze into JKF airport this week spotless in white. You might not be a Posh fan but must admit she did get it spot on with the bag.

This Marc Jacobs Carolyn Patchwork Leather Bag is even more beautiful than the one hanging off VB’s arm. Cancel your holiday and spend £740 on this instead. The Ronald

Marc Jacobs must-have

Your 5-a-day dished up. It’s good for you.

1 Birth live on TV and baby-to-be rumours. Check out Jordan versus Nicole Richie.

2 Union Jack dress and $26 A-list dress. Check out Angelina Jolie versus Geri Halliwell.

3 Chelsea star Wag wedding and Do Ya Think I’m Sexy wedding. Check out John Terry versus Rod Stewart.

4 Glamour-model bump and Oscar-winning bump. Check out Jordan versus Julia Roberts.

5 Rock group spat and actress-press spat. Check out Rolling Stones versus Angelina Jolie.

That $26 dress